Participatory Training With Women Domestic Workers on Understanding Violence Against Women

The third session for women domestic workers under the Sapne Mere Bhavishya Mera program was held on 30^th July 2021, in Harijan Basti, Gurugram. There were 36 women domestic workers and 2 adolescents who participated.

The session started with a discussion on the participants’ understanding of the word hinsa, that is, violence. Jhagda, ladayi, maar-peet, gharelu hinsa – the responses ranged from fighting, to fisticuffs, to domestic violence.

Was violence acceptable? “Agar thoda bahut maarta hai, toh chal jaata hai” (If  a husband hits his wife a little bit, it isn’t a problem)” said one of the women. If a woman hits her husband, then she is labelled characterless (bacchalan) whereas men seem to get the liberty to do it. “He must be frustrated from work, is how we justify it,” the women said.

What about the eve-teasing, winking and passing of lewd comments by men, which also women experience? Does such harassment constitute violence? This led the domestic workers to think about their own daily experiences, when they walk to work, or even in the homes they work in. Why do they accept it as “part of a man’s behaviour”? The facilitator brought in sexual harassment, and sexual harassment at workplace into the discussion, to build understanding on the issue of what is sexual harassment and how it is also a form of violence that women experience. She also explained the different types of sexual harassment using examples from everyday life, of the harassment women face at home, at the workplace, on the streets.

“Hinsa bahut bahut tarah ka hai” (Violence takes many forms), the women agreed.

Jyoti, an adolescent daughter of one of the women, drew the women’s attention to how those who have power, use violence as a form to exercise that power over others. “Hinsa tab hoti hai, jab ek ko dusre se upar jaana hota hai” [Violence takes place when one wants to show power over another]. Hadn’t the women experienced this?

After the discussion on the power dynamics, the facilitator conducted a problem tree analysis. A chart paper with a tree drawn on it was pasted on the wall. The tree had a few leaves sketched in different colours. She asked the trainees to state some of the consequences and impact of violence on them. As the women gave their answers, she wrote them inside each leaf. Tension, depression, suicide, ruined lives, no interest in work, were some of the answers.

Violence was the direct cause of these consequences, but the perpetration of violence has deep-rooted causes – causes that stem from patriarchy, power imbalances and socialisation that gives a higher position to men over women.

What could be done to address violence against women? How can this situation change when men are responsible for the violence and harassment women experience?

The facilitator shared the view that it is important not only to make girls aware of the harassment they will face, but also to make boys aware of their own behaviour, to make them understand that girls are equals and violence against anyone is unacceptable.

“If a husband chops the vegetables, the wife can cook the food,” said Meera. “Gender roles need to be done away with because both men and women are earning for the family.”